Cultural Differences: Talking to Strangers in France

This article is about an American friend, Anna Chek, who lives in France. These stories are hers as she’s shared them on her Facebook.

Anna says:

Engaging with people is of huge interest to me. My late husband always said of me,

Anna collects people.”

So Anna seemed a perfect choice when I was looking for someone to give me examples of what its like to talk to strangers in France, beyond my own experiences.

Introducing Anna Chek

What happens when a French person, a stranger, instigates a conversation with me:

Talking with Strangers in France #1

Image credit: Anna Check

Here’s a snippet to lead us into this conversation about talking with strangers in France…

I was privileged to speak to this couple, at the grocery store. The man was walking behind me and said,

I like your hair.” (in French, of course).

I turned, smiled, and said,

Merci.”

He then said he liked my smile as well. Then, a conversation about his beard, and the fact that he and his wife have five daughters.

Some of these interactions can be brief but others can lead to more…

Talking with Strangers in France #2

Today was eventful, Anna says. I always meet a friend on Sunday morning, at 10 am at a local large boulangerie (bakery).

They have the best coffee in our region, which is my opinion, of course.

We had a good chat and some mutual friends showed up. The more the merrier.

At some point, a couple sat at a table slightly behind me and to my right. They were noticeable because the husband was wearing flashy, edgy, Dolce & Gabanna glasses. White, which went with his white hair.

They were:

FLASH!” The French love statement glasses. These were rock-star glasses!

The woman looked at us frequently.

The others left, and I stayed behind.

The woman leaned in and asked my nationality. I said,

American.” Well… that was a key word. They live in a small community that was occupied by US troops during WWI, and evidently, the Americans gave out, literally, tons of food to the French in the area. So Americans are highly regarded there.

She is a retired English teacher, so she spoke very good English. Her husband speaks no English but said he understands it.
We spoke some French as well. We really hit it off, they are my age, and they asked if I would please come for dinner soon. I enthusiastically agreed to do so. Now realize I will ask if we can do lunch instead, as I’m not great at driving at night on unfamiliar roads.

The roads are about 1.5 lanes wide, as most cross-cross the countryside. When I say I live in rural France, trust me, it’s RURAL. Some roads are wide enough for only a tractor, and if meeting another car, both must pull over to the shoulder which is narrow and with a ditch for water run-off.

It’s not always a comfortable proposition.

I’m looking forward to getting together with these people. The woman, “ Marie,” said their house is small and built around an old train car. She said everyone falls in love with their house. I’m certain I will be no exception.”

Watch this space for a continuation of this story…

Talking with Strangers in France #3

Here’s yet another of Anna’s stories:

I went grocery shopping today, just to pick up a few items. While there, I noticed an older couple (how many more years can I say that? After all, I qualify) and they just stood out. They were dressed similarly, either by design or by years of living together and melding together in their style. The man was tall and good-looking, in a country-French kind of way. Everyday clothing one would wear around the house. Comfortable. And they just stood out, at least to me they did.

The woman was someone I would call “handsome.” She was well made up but achieved her look with minimum makeup. A little “rouge” (as my mother would say) and a soft red lipstick. Maybe a light foundation. Like many French women, she had beautiful skin.

Both were wearing light beige jackets, and the woman had narrow black slacks, the man, maybe dark jeans. She was wearing a sort of show-stopping hat, similar to a beret in a way, yet not. It had a rigid base, in black, and a flat top in an ivory color. It looked like it was old, but well-cared for and in perfect condition. Her silver hair (short) was peeking out around the edges. Her eyebrows were shot with silver, but mostly black. The man was wearing a black hat, but different from hers.

My mother used the word “snazzy” to describe how some people looked. Of this couple, I would say, “Casual Snazzy.” I so wanted to talk to them.

Fast forward, and I saw a cut of beef that I wanted to try. It was meaty, and fatty, with bones. I decided to ask the butcher how to prepare it. Seconds after I went to the butcher counter, the couple stepped up. We exchanged polite “Bonjours” and waited and waited. The woman was becoming impatient. So was I.

Then I had a flash! Ask for her advice on preparation!

So I asked for her “council” as that is what one says regarding preparing food.

It was meat for an old and classic dish, ‘pot-a-Feu.’  I knew how to prepare it, but let her explain, anyway. Cook it in a pot with carrots, potatoes, leeks, and turnips.

Then the man chimed in.

You have to put a marrow bone in for the last 15 minutes!” He stepped aside and went to a refrigerated section and came back with a package of two bones. He suggested I ask the butcher to break up the package and just buy one bone, but I told him I have dogs who will enjoy the other bone.

They were both very smiley and effusive in saying “Au Revoir,” (good-bye) and “Bonne journee.” (Have a good day.)

Postscript from Anna

Sometimes people say I write too much and I probably do… Some fun things have happened and I should record them before I forget.

• A conversation with two young men about my car, and yesterday, with two 14-year-old girls, who are studying English. All because one of them sneezed several times and I said, “Bless you,” after each sneeze. They both want to travel to “America.”

This postscript implies that there may be more stories to come from Anna, cross your fingers and watch this space.

Do you talk to strangers? Share your experiences in the comments section below.

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